je m'aime

Panti Wreda Semarang

It was always in the back of my mind to go volunteering. And since social media is so massive nowadays, like, really massive, you can practically find any concert tickets or bags or things, even volunteering opportunities now are all over the thread and it's a magical thing when i found that someone inviting Semarang citizen to join her event.

What's funny is that I was contemplating to reach this person because what if the venue was too far, what if the venue was this, or that. But then, I found out that it was at Panti Wredha Rindang Asih II right 2 kilometers from my house. Wow!

The person, Mba Inung, was literally impulsive about this event. First, she's new to town, not having that many acquaintances here. I think it's her extroverted side that nudge her to spend her weekend outside, rather than resting at her dorm. Probably her love for social work also give her a chance to go on social visit, last month (June) she went to visit Rumah Surga Semarang with several of her close friends, and fast forward to this month, she decided on the date & place and then went online and asked users on thread to come and join her journey.

Viva social media!

Team leader and the winner

One thing I admire the most about the elders who lives in the senior home, there are so many factors that they end up together with people their age. There are so many reasons for them to scowl/resent the place and to the people who visit them once (probably me included), but no, the reaction I get from yesterday is far from that.

They were all ecstatic to see foreign faces (me and the team). As long as they got their karaoke slot, they're willing to see what we got on our sleeves. Haha.

We bought balloons and cups for games. We know about their limited movement, so the team leader decided on turning the cups and touched the paper. It's enough to give them an activity before lunch. And some of the Opa (elderly man) were not keen on games and just talked to one of us.

I took the last table with full with Opa, two in chairs and the other two also in chairs but willingly to join the games. Hihi. Contrary to my initial believe, I found myself interacting naturally with them. I usually was on the introverted side, my shyness tended to be the one that limiting myself, now I found myself just casually talked to them. 

Opa from different table was surprised because our team was all-girl team and he immediately shouted, "Thank you girls, I strongly hope you guys find your soulmate after this. After you go and leave this place, I sincerely hope you guys find the one!!!"

We were taken aback and I found it silly cause it's not that easy to find some kind of guy to link up, but then... I tried to put me in his shoes, from a perspective of someone living in senior home, watching us girls visiting them and take time to hang out with them, I found that me too would wish all good things happen to these youngsters.

Again, so many factors that they ended up living together in a senior home, far away from family. It definitely soften your heart. But above all, I am so touched they think about what good wishes. All elders I met along the way always gave a good advice and wish. That, from me with words of affirmation as a love language, I am incredibly grateful.

My heart is full.

Donating ✅

Volunteering ✅

Thank you to sweet souls (me, Dinda, Inung, Nita, Helmi)

Onto the the next chapter woohooo ✈️

more about volunteer stories

From when I walked around Simpang Lima

You know when I made A Glimpse to My Life Before 35, somehow I knew that I was rolling into a new stage, so that I had to record what I felt right in that moment, and I was right.

Or probably it is I who wish for a new chapter...?

Let's just say my chart gave it away and I thought it would be something good.

Yes, it is good, because I finally have all the time in the world to re-assess my mind palace, access of what's working and not working in my life, and apply to the openings that I thought I wouldn't.

At least, I didn't dwell on why I was let go from work. I let go from my work because simply there's no place for me to learn anymore. I have to learn about my next chapter somewhere else. The things I was worried about 5 years ago, 3 years ago, now have happened. But maybe because of that over overthinking, I can take it easily now. My life is a series of wheel of fortune. Sometimes I was up there, doors opening up easily, but sometimes something bring me close to the ground.

I donate better to various channel now, I set aside time for my friend, I help my friend set up her first store while she's good enough to adopt my name take it to the store payment: DiDi Team for Todayfinds.id! 

I feel like im growing into someone entirely foreign to me.

It's only July and I feel like I've gone through stages of life in just 3 months. Talk to you later!

Oh, how the universe loves playing tricks on me.

Following my post last month, my life got suspended. I feel like everything in me pause-ing, although life keeps rolling away. Morning to morning, the full moon to new moon, and growing again. But I stop moving.

I am stranded.

I try to be honest and talk to myself about it, inside my brain is like how an astronaut got suspended on the air, he's not going up, he's not going down, he's just floating. That's how my life is right now.

One moment I believe im doing fine, the next moment life throws out an 180.

Probably next time I would say everything is so so, not too well, not too bad. My unintelligible thought when I was in college making its comeback: probably dont be too happy about where you are nji, cause when there's happiness, it always follows by the opposite. 

Maybe it's time for me to participate in my own life. I cannot emphasize enough how this video finds me at the right moment. Her sketches and screenwriting always blow me away. And at this moment, it's eating me inside out.

But if you listen carefully, the people who actually changed the shape of their lives rarely began with a plan at all. They started in a small, sometimes mildly humiliating way. It almost always looks like confusion, but confusion, it turns out, is the beginning of most interesting lives.

Maybe I am meant to start a new life. The old mold doesn't fit me anymore: the tight-knit office gang, platonic relationship where I always suppress my feelings, the leader who don't know how to lead me cause he doesn't know what to do to me and my skill, all the overthinking, everything.

But that doesn't mean the confusion goes away. It is replaced with the new problem, new confusion, new overthinking. Hahaaaaaaaa.

It is not the time where I contemplate should I pursue creative writing or learning oil painting. I have to start to build the foundation. I don't know where it will lead me to, but I hope it's something greater.

All kudos to my mom who support me in this hardest time. And my friends who seem to catch my back whenever I get tired and need to rest.

In the meantime, let's not be afraid to try. Never stop trying. Never stop learning.

Dermaga Coffee, Semarang

 

Still flying solo, with hair in a shade lighter, drooping cheeks cause of my downturn smile, lips in lighter color too, and heavier weight.

Honestly those things I mentioned above don't put that much weight on my mind, it's just facts. The 20-something-me would be terrified of any slight difference. The musings and yearnings didn't fade but softened.

But still.

There are many things that change but still the same thing remains: I still cannot do a relationship.

The chronic overthinking and the amount of myself pondering over same problems  tenth times or more, is still there. I wouldn't jump into any life-changing decision without getting it over and over in my mind.

And that keeps me for getting the life that I want.

What is it that I want? Idk. To spend my life forever with my person?

Wow I did not just write that. DID I?

--

Anywaaaaaays, there's always this shadow in the back of my mind that saying: "Well, actually I did great. My life is amazing." but somehow I refuse to say it out loud. Saying it out loud actually jinx it, I believe. But let me, for this once, before I turn 35: Well, nji, actually you did great. Didn't die young, you're still here, you can go wherever you want, you can eat whatever you need, you're healthy, you're always at the place at the right moment. Everything turns out amazing. Cheers!

1. Someone said December 25 - 31 was a void. Not really a holiday but not a week of hustle either. I beg to differ. Mom took me to SOLO and WONOGIRI for a 4-days vacation and Fitri tagged along. At some point, Fitri asked me what happened if she didn't tag along, well, i would be mute. She laughed and muttered, what if you're gone mute even to your husband later? What a weird conclusion. I wouldn't be with someone whom I dont feel safe with. Duh.

2. Sense of safety is not only about being un-threatened, it's also a sense of comfortable, be at ease, I can do anything like I don't need to appease anyone. I can act freely without people cringing at my sad upbringing, I love a little dark joke to lighten my mood. Paradox. That's how I survive. But I also love when people pick up my despair and saying everything's gonna be okay. Because in the end of the day, there are so many layers to my personality so that some substack read sum up my self: some parts of you only emerge for certain people. I am waiting for the day that someone understand im made of puzzle but there's no need to make sense of it.

3. The whole year is just me learning I can talk to opposite gender without being threatened. HAHA. I've come a long way right? How do I say this, I didn't really have that much experience in having guys as friends because growing up, it's always them who were interested in me that talk to me. So me being shy talking to opposite gender because I don't have any experience to do genuine talk, like a friend to another friend. I don't know how but the gym membership unlock something in me this year and im now okay to talk to anyone.

4. Full of whimsy, thank God, the whimsy is still here even in 2025. Rather than looking the world through rose-colored glasses, I make myself open and to any kind of goodness the universe might throw my way. I pride myself in the way I see things full of magic and im attracted to good vibes only. The burnt toast theory also happened. When I pull out all deck cards on the table, I finally understand why I missed the momentum. One thing and another. I'm still grateful how life unfolds. And to my friends who are there when things get complicated and untie it for me, niceeeee. I believe in timing and intention.

5. Of all the reading I read this year, not fiction, probably this one stuck me the most: building a life that feels intentional, I want to arrive at eighty without wondering if I could have lived with more courage, curiosity, or tenderness. I have arrived to the year I never thought I would. 35 is used to be so far away, if not far away, it's the age where I... let go. That probably what fueled me to go to more functions this year, explore more communities, join whatever fate telling me to (art therapy, freelance project, etc), just in case.

 Watching Conan Gray video on vogue channel about him moving to NYC is like a breather to the dark space inside my head. Like him, I do like watching people, even more now that we live in social media spaces rather than irl, and I always like "What do I do? What should I do? Should I take their fun personality and make it mine? They seem so interesting".

Hence, I now making videos on tiktok based on cool people on internet. Sometimes, I touch on dark and cold personality, the one that screams "bruhh, you look awesome!!" and some other times I am all girly and princess-y with pearl headband and all smiley. 

I am this age and still don't know how to live my life.

My close friends, we share the same concerned, whenever we talk about it, we end up giving silent replies when we talk about it. Because we don't know. Yet. 

No one really knows. I guess.

There's unspoken rules for women in my age (even though people are likely more open minded now) but still, people expect me to do a, b, c, d, and conceal it with "we're doing it for you so you can have a better life".

But then, I think about it all over again. Why I reject the ideas of the timeline of the adult age, in the age 22 you have to do this, in 25 you get that, and in 28 blah blah blah.

I haven't been living my best life because I'm busy rejecting those ideas when I could just... live.

Playlist:

Conan Gray - People Watching

NCT Dream - Life is Still Goes On

Death is something that really I hope I can free from. But then there's no life without death. I once made an oath to myself that I wouldn't experience death before me. But no, life and death is nobody's business except for Him.



I used to be so obsessed with how to cope around death when I hadn't experience any of it. The passing of a family member is one of great fear in my life. The foretold story about death and what happened in the family from books, tweets, and movies are enough for me. I don't need to see it happen in real life.

(Maybe that's why I was so hung up with Monster Calls, book and movie. It's about a passing member of family, the important one.)

And yet, life and death is the most absolute thing in the world. It happens to everyone.

grandma smiled at the birthday cake from mom

Books I read regarding mental illness, self-harm, even suicide are flooding my reading list since 3 years ago, the year when I slided into adulthood and real life. I desperately found a thing to hold on while the characters on the book died. It's only character, they said. I argued back, well, books are based on real life experience. Somewhere in other side of the world, it happened to some family and my heart ached for them.

my cousin feeding grandma birthday cake

Death came to my family recently. It took our grandma/and mom. After 27 years, I was there to see the first passing with my own eyes, ripped from the body we used to pat, embrace, caress, and love. I didn't know how to let myself go because the first thought on my mind was to show understanding to my mother and aunt who were there and their loss was greater than me. I shouldn't give them a push button by breaking down there and then they were the one to comfort me rather than I did to them. So, I stood there and gave the latest caress, pat, and farewell to the body of grandma. Her soul was finally free. Eventually, she was free from the pain.

Her life was filled with religious and social activities around the neighborhood. She's also a dear person for a handful of people around us. A good life has been lived.

-----


Whether it's from illness or something else, death is devastating. Last month, we celebrate mental health awareness month, mental illness is equally horrendous as physical illness. I hope you have someone to talk to when you need it. Embrace those who's dear to your heart and make them feel that you care for them. And maybe, the regret is not something that you feel after someone's dear to you leave you one day.

My last trip to Jakarta was.... fun.

I didn't get what I wanted but it was fun while it last.



Well, I did have something to do attend back then so I stayed for entire week in my friend's dorm in Jakarta Selatan. I went around when I had leisure time. I quickly learned the road and building near my friend's place so that whenever Gojek driver asked me where it located, I could say confidently that it's near building X or near Y Park.

Lol, I sounded like locals in a week!

Back then, when I did come to that big city, I didn't even know how to reach my friend's place and I trusted Gojek driver to take me home. Although it took 15 minutes late than the usual time.

It's true I spent one evening jogging around the neighborhood. I was lost and my phone lagged. After some lousy lead Google maps (it's not loaded easily, mind you) so I had to stop for more than 1 min to get Google Maps working.

I intended to Lotte Mart Fatmawati in hope that I would get to this big mall where many Kpop stars stepped in. Oh boi. Little did I know. On the way with the Gojek driver (GoCar), I realized my foolishess and texted my friend. 'Well, I mistakenly input Lotte Mart Fatmawati when I wanted to go to other place.' Then, she facepalmed and answered my text while laughing at me.

It was not mall, I guess, it's more like supermarket?? I just went around and went out to think about my next destination.

Surely, as someone who has timid side, I admit that I enjoy wandering alone. Of course, I still felt a little shy to go to one shop and interacted with the attendant. Or I went to this small street vendor to buy something to eat.

I decided to have lunch outside, rather than in the supermarket, because thanks it'd be cheaper. So, I did go this one street vendor and bought a plate of Bakmi Goreng. The sun's schorching hot, so I made sure I ordered fresh drinks: ice orange (?). I knew I looked weird because who ordered lunch before 12 AM alone in street vendor?

But because no one bothered to look at me in pity so I busied myself with gadget and made sure I guarded all my belongings so that no one could touch anything. Beware, it's big city, we're talking about.

Then, I wondered if I could go to any gallery after that.

My friend would suggest all galleries in Jakarta and I picked the one with free entry. /OF COURSE/ I ordered Gojek to Galleri Nasional Indonesia but no one accepted. One driver even rejected my order! It was more than 12 KM, I thought. I gave up just like that.

Don't worry I still have plenty of time, I said to myself.

I gave up and I decided to go to my initial destination: Lotte Mart Shopping Avenue! Ugh, that place reeke money, expensive money. Everywhere I see expensive brand of clothes, bags, and cosmetics. I rolled my eyes all the time. This place was not for me. Why would I bother?

The clock showed it was 3 o'clock and I walked out. Google Maps said my current spot with my friend's place was close so instead of taking Gojek, I walked. True, I walked so that I saw this ITC Semanggi on my way.

Lol, I stepped in and said to myself, well, I should go here rather than LMSA, tbh. /giggled/ I spent almost 1 hrs inside and I went home with light heart.

That's true, my friend, I bought new pair of shoes (black formal ones that I desperately needed for formal occasion) and I patted myself, I made right choice stepping in.

I spent another 1 hr to walk home. That's my exercise that day. A lot of walk.

I put up half of journey in here:

Why would anyone draw their own nightmare? 
nightmare; a dream that results in feelings of extreme fear, horror, distress, or anxiety.

for me, when a friend talked about herself having constant nightmares, i thought she should express them out.
since she's good at drawing, she can pour her nightmare out into drawing.
i cant draw, i write. so, i pour it out into one document and save it on my drive. express and lock it away.

speaking of nightmare, who never had nightmare before? everyone did. everyone still does. the unpleasant dream that is succumbed from a problem we suppress into subconsciousness. any dream will show you what your mind have been holding of lately.

i hardly talk about me having nightmare, as i said above, i write. at least, i express them, i confront them. and im on the way of healing myself.
because, instead of letting someone else, pointing out 'what the problem is' by myself is much better.

confront your nightmare, talk to them, soothe them like you would to a wounded friend, and watch them dissolve. 

i find some inktober vids (related to dark things, nightmare) on youtube. if i could draw, i would go for this vibe. lemme share it below.
one,
two.
Oh, and I just found this video, if you can't draw, having an illustrator is also an option for you to express your nightmare: three.

Taking english lesson in my high school year was interesting. I am not much of a talker but I kinda like me talking in english /insert giggling sound/.
One time after binge watching Sherlock Holmes series by BBC, I found myself talking in their accent. Like you guys do in your free time, I spent the rest of the day talking to myself in British accent.
Then, last weekend before I munched on my late lunch, I quickly took video of me talking gibberish. One of the reason I set up youtube account is for me to be able to express myself and talk more.

And I am currently falling for vintage filter so... Yeah, I edited the video using FilmoraGo. This application is easy to use and I really love the feature inside, especially the one involving credit/title. FilmoraGo offers cute credit/title for your video. 

As you can see below.





Anyway, I am currently reading Girl in The Dark by Anna Lyndsey. It is about a girl who spends her days holing up in the dark. She even shuts every windows and doors, then make sure not a single ray of sun light comes in. I want to know about her character and find out the reason why she lives in the dark.

The life train has wrecked me lately. Some things don't work out as I thought it would. Some news take me by surprise and knocked the air out of my lungs. I scream for help. I wish for some leaking, to flow the dark liquid inside this heart out. For all this time, my head is crystal clear. But I don't know how long it would stay that way.

I'm thankful the sky and the greens entertain me with their beauty. The contrast makes it beautiful. It makes me shift my focus into something else, into something I enjoy.
Enjoy the things till it lasts.



What about you? Is there something you want to share?

Sometimes, it's good to sit on this desk and listening to the radio. It brings past memories. Since young age, I've been so self-conscious of what ballad song gave me. It gave me chills, made me slow down whatever-I-do-at-the-moment, and stopped: wow this song was really good. Although I didnt know what the meaning of the song. The music spoke for itself.
That's what I love about 90s era. I was too little to understand the lyric but it jolted awake something inside, it sparked and drawn me in.
Radio, now, enters a whole new version. I feel foreing listen to them. The announcers talk too much, I hate the songs, but I love the corner that plays songs from 90's-00's. It brings me memories. Each songs retrieve certain special memories. 



Playlist:
Padi - Rapuh
Element - Rahasia Hati
Laluna - Selepas Kau Pergi
Marcell - Firasat
Spice Girls - Viva Forever
Britney Spears - Sometimes
Tina Arena ft Marc Anthony - I Want to Spend My Lifetime
Coco Lee - A Love Before Time

You know, sometimes you carry memories even for five or ten years and then when you look back, you cant help but exclaim, 'I think it just happened last year!'.

We're at this journey to out of town and we're riding this bus for maybe more than 10 hours. I had my music player as my must-bring item. I didnt really remember what I put it inside, since I havent been kpop fan at that moment. Yet. So maybe some love songs from Maliq, Ecoutez, and some other foreign artists. But I remember putting Mars OST in. The song is loud and yet emotional. Listening to the song reminded me of the drama story. Ling who suffered much of past traumatic experience supporting his girlfriend who also had this trauma in the past and they both got through together. It was more than 3 years after the actual drama series been played. I like it enough to put it in my player for months. I often renew my playlist for just in one month or two. See, I get bored easily.

Some friends, two of them, asked me to lend my music player because the journey got boring. I did because I needed some sleep gave it to them. Few hours later, I got up and asked what songs they listened to. Cause some of them were sappy and not the mainstream ones. I was surprised because they listened to this song in repeat because one of them liked it.

I was like, 'What the--? You know this song?'. I didnt really remember what they said. Or maybe they didnt actually reply my question and I just gawked there while standing up and went back to my seat (and continued gawking).

Is this fate?

Haha. Eat that fate because nothing really happened after that.

And I dunno why I still remember it.

I dunno why I post this. 

On the rainy weather, you cant see your favorite sunsets. Maybe you'll feel fine and move on, ignore the fact that the sunset is hiding behind that pale clouds on the sky. Then, one month later, when you finally get to see the sunsets and then suddenly that tiny smile dancing in the verge of your lips silently enjoying the beauty of that cheerful orange color; along with hugs and kisses from that particular person. 

Sitting by the fire, enjoying hot tea from your favorite mugs with that great playlist streaming from your headphone.

Even then, you can enjoy the snow days the way you like the sandy beaches with palm trees on the summer. The cute & comfortable mittens with matching socks are suitable for stars seeing on the night of winter days. The same goes for your favorite baggy t-shirt, shorts, & shades for the summer days.

Good hair days and your fave-brand mascara for going out with your bffs, running through your planners to check the vacation schedule you've been planning 3 months ahead to pay those sleepless days because of your hectic work. Driving into somewhere new; seeing tulips bloom; watching waterfalls by the lake. Let your scarf blown by the wind along the shore; build a castle from the sand; taking pictures of the palm trees with the clear sky as the background. 

Being grateful just for the mere early mornings; 24-hours-on electricity; that kitty cats that always awaits you when you exit the house; your favorite smoothies from your favorite stall; elevators so you dont need to run your lungs out just to reach your office; random pencils you place on your bag when you run out of pen and you need to write down important contact; handwritten letters full of love from your children or significant other; surpise candlelight dinner; clean water; or stars peeking your bedroom window on the peaceful night before summer starts.

There are so many beautiful reasons to be happy. 

So, what is your fave food? 
I wish everyone have a great October!


currently playing:
Adele - Turning Tables
Lily Allen - Who'd have known
Natasha B - Soulmate
Boyz II Men - If You Leave Me Now

Rilakkuma. Have you heard about that?Um, it's actually a bear, Japanese character made by San-X who debuted in 2003. Rilakkuma means 'bear in relaxed mood'.

Rilakkuma mysteriously appears in the female office worker Kaoru's apartment one day. He is a soft toy bear who has apparently decided to take up residence there. On his back is a zipper which when opened reveals a light blue polka dot patterned material. The contents or nature of this zipper is unknown.He was first seen in a series of picture books called Rilakkuma Seikatsu produced by San-X but since has become equally popular as a soft-toy character. In the picture books, he is often seen dressed up in a variety of costumes such as a kappa costume. In addition, it is implied that even in his usual appearance, his entire lower body is a costume, which he will often replace when it gets old or dirty (Rilakkuma is frequently seen sitting around waiting for suits that look exactly like him to dry on the clothes line). However, it is not clear whether his head is also part of his costumeHis favorite foods are dango, pancakes, omurice and custard pudding. True to his name, he enjoys relaxing and his favorite things include sleeping, lying around, watching television, listening to music and soaking in hot springs. He loves using Kaoru's yellow bean bag pillow, although there has been some controversy whether or not the yellow bean bag pillow is in fact Kiiroitori. Despite some confusion that often occurs relating to Rilakkuma and his friend Korilakkuma's genders, it is stated on the San-X site that he is in fact a male, while Korilakkuma is indeed female.
His Character:

• At all time and everywhere he goes he is continuously lazy and relaxed.
• He is totally stress-free and also doing things on his own pace.
• He is someone impossible to be hated by others.
• You will be dragged into Rilakkuma’s world and become lazy and relaxed while watching what everything he does.

Isn't it cute? Well, it is for me. I've been compiling Rilakkuma's picture from tumblr and it's really impossible to hate cause it's too cute. My fave!He's often seen in straight-face. Which sometimes I am like that too. (Well, maybe not sometimes, always, I KNOW!)

so, I kinda open my tumblr's dashboard and I found these question from magazine review. Suddenly I want to observe myself with those questions. You guys can try it too..


Questions!
1. Three things that are most important to you in your life.
    my mom, my family, and my gadgets 
2. Something that makes you happy when you hear it.
    I can get something in my wish-list which is cost less or even for free.
3. If you were to express your feelings right now.
   I think I'm blessed.
4. Something you cannot resist buying.
    Food. And coffee.

5. A girl boy who will make you fall head over heels.
    check my post below :3
6. Three things that you wish from your girlboyfriend.
     Good-looking, humorous, nice smile.
7. The song you enjoy best amongst your recent music list.
    Pink - Fuckin' Perfect
8. Reveal a secret about yourself that you have never said before.
    I like babies? (I can't think of any secret I havent said before)
9. Three people you respect the most.
     My mom, people who strive for world piece, people who makes great music
10. Your life’s motto.
     Always be true to yourself and be positive.

Pagi-pagi disuguhi tayangan Beliebers yang lari-lari histeris di bandara Soekarno Hatta dan nangis sesenggukan karena gak bisa lihat Justin Bieber yang baru take off. Ada yang sampe marah-marah, "Justin, jangan gitu dooong. Hiks. Katanya sayang sama Beliebers, masak gak mau nemuin kita barang sebentar aja. Mana katanya sayang?"
Doeng!
Yaelah, nduk, dia capek kali, jet-lag gituuuh.Ato kalo gak dia udah takut duluan ama Beliebers yang teriak-teriak panik gitu. Trus para pendamping Bieber itu takut ntar bintangnya kenapa-kenapa jadi langsung pergi ke hotel atau kemana gitu.
Sumprit deh, dahsyat tuh para Beliebers yang udah nungguin di bandara. Mereka kan pada masih remaja-remaja gitu, badannya masih pada kurus-kurus. Untung aja kurus, jadi waktu lari-lari gak banyak yang saling nyenggol atau dorong-dorongan, yah dari tayangan di teve tadi sih gitu. 


Ehm, tapi.. Bentar deh..


Diibaratin kalo yang dateng tuh SHINee, Minho lah. Dan aku udah nungguin di bandara, gak taunya doi cuma lewat, keluar bandara langsung cabut.


eeeeh..
Eeeeeehhhh..
EEEEEHHHHHH....


NOOOOO!!! Stop walking, stooop, I cant see you clearly!!! Please, stopppp!!!!


Hehe.. ngerti deh perasaan Beliebers. Gak rela banget idola kita yang belum tentu setahun sekali dateng ke Indonesia lewat gitu aja tanpa kita lihat langsung. Apalagi keabisan tiket konsernya atau gak bisa lihat dia manggung. Kyaaaaaaaaa...